Culture Vultures - The Singapore Night Festival promised eclectic performers and paraphernalia in the night sky, lightshows and a host of other nocturnal attractions. Sadly, instead of arriving to see the National Museum's expansive historic building lit up, it was only lit by the reflections of the lights from the two music shows in the foreground - one Western, one Asian. Being in the middle of the two stages was a cacophony of plinks and plonks in all the wrong places.
The one item of interest was the graffiti wall, but even that had 'control' stamped all over it. We ended up parking ourselves at the courtyard bar and not seeing any other acts. Fail.
Popping up - If you stand at Tanjong Beach Club and look out to sea, there's a small peninsula that juts out into the water. We were lucky to be invited to our first pop-up brunch there: bring amazing food, fine wines, a collapsible table and a makeshift cover. Add water (yes, it rained a little) and friends. A wonderful afternoon in a secluded spot with some of our favourite people. Diamond.
Soldiering on - Set in one of the most ridiculously kitted out bachelor pads in Singapore (it even has a private rooftop pool), the kids at Nomu hosted another awesome event. The only thing lacking at Apocalypse Nomu was the smell of napalm; soldiers, nurses and a whole lot of guns squeezed onto the roof until the fun police showed up to tear the party down. Someday this war's gonna end...
"I love the smell of napalm in the morning"
Being a Foodographer - I attended a food photography course hosted by acclaimed local food blogger, Dr. Leslie Tay at Tetsu Restaurant. Naturally, I was the only ang moh in the room, which made me feel mildly self-conscious when the hokkien 'in-jokes' were rolled out. Nevertheless, it was a fun afternoon eyeballing other people's cameras, some of which had lenses larger than my head.
Digging Deep at Stereolounge - After just four gigs at other night spots around Singapore, DJs Julian Moore, Dan Paris and Dash graced the stage at Stereolounge and out-lasted the main dancefloor. Pulling in the crowd that loves solid electronic sounds, the lounge had a vibrant buzz despite it being the height of the summer and the time of many Europats' holidays 'en famille'.
Everybody wants to be a DJ...
Turning Peranakan - Hidden in the row of shophouses near Tanjong Pagar Market is the home of Peranakan food, Blue Ginger. Crispy kueh pie tie, succulent otak otak, meltingly soft beef rendang, fragrant ayam buah keluak and chillified sambal terong goreng all washed down with a few glasses of the house white. A sumptuous feast, easy on the wallet and perfect for an intimate meal catching up with old friends.
Getting high - The birthday extravaganza for my husband was spectacularly held at the home of the world's longest rooftop pool, the stunning Marina Bay Sands. We checked in for two nights and enjoyed 45th floor views of the Gardens by the Bay currently under construction and the port littered with container ships of all shapes and sizes. Service was impeccable and losing S$300 in twenty minutes at the casino was a uniquely sobering experience. We knew it was time to leave when the guy next to us pulled out two S$1000 notes to exchange for chips. High rollers we ain't.
Has to be seen to be believed.
Expanding our dumpling repertoire - The Cathay was the selected venue for a chow down and catch up with an old friend from university days. Slightly cheaper than our usual haunt, Si Chuan Dou Ha, but equally solid in the dumpling stakes, this is somewhere we would return. I even liked the chicken feet - just the right amount of gristle and soya sauce flavoured skin.
Next up, is our long-awaited HONEYMOON IN JAPAN! All will be quiet on the Eastern front for a little while but stayed tuned for news of how two ang mohs coped in the hot waters and techno fields of Japan. Sayonara for now!
"Summer Time" in Singapore = Party Central... This month, we have mostly been slammin' it hard...
Party at The Plantation - Set in the midst of the Portsdown jungle is a very special place: hidden from the masses, nature all around... Man, our friend knows how to throw a good party. Catered by Fine Palate, the order of the day is "drink the bar... dry". We say, "CAN!"
Celebrating Father's Day - Out for dinner with my Grandad and all of my aunts and uncles... The spot we chose was in deepest darkest Serangoon Gardens. The queue was immense. We had even booked a table but had to stand outside to wait for those lucky people inside to finish wiping the corners of their mouths. A feast ensued ~ I think my family thought I looked like a refugee that hadn't eaten in a month. True gluttony at its finest hour. That's what happens when you're not picking up the tab.
The launch of Marina Bay Sands - Slick was the order of the day, once we had conquered the enormous line of dressed to the nines crowd. The champagne flowed, the canapés rocked and the gala dinner was impressive given that the thronging masses totalled three thousand. The Jersey Boys taught us how to "walk like a man" and Diana Ross showed us how to groove like a sixty-six year old should. Truly immense. We rounded off the evening by collaring the CEO who told us that the event had cost no less than USD10 million. After I had put my eyeballs back into their rightful sockets, I marvelled at the incredulous expense but in my suitably inebriated mind decided that it was a fair amount to spend given the total cost of the resort topped USD5 billion. That's the way we roll. I look forward to helping dear Sheldon maintain his three Boeing aircraft by chucking a few crisp notes on red 13.
Another birthday, another boat party - And why not? We live on an island surrounded by rancid, oil-infested waters. What better than to get on a boat and assume the position of "drink to forget"? This time, we opted for the ultimate in P*I*M*P luxury and spent thirteen hours on a trimaran with no less than six flatscreen TVs in the lower deck. A day in the life of a celebrity. For real. Do it, before you die.
Interim documentaries - When not abusing our livers, we like nothing better than to lock the door and watch Storyville documentaries. Recommended this month is Kim Jong Il's Comedy Club - a story about three Danish 'dudes' (for want of a better phrase - watch it, you'll agree) who travel to North Korea on the pretense that they are a small Danish theatre troupe on a cultural exchange. It's difficult to find something so touching yet hilarious, political yet sentimental in the world wide web of moving image.
Third time lucky, Rawa - Once, twice, three times a lady! It's just too alluring...
Next up is an attempt to detox with marginally less partying until hubby's amazing surprise birthday... It's going to be a big one... Stay tuned!
This time, we had vowed not to be up until 6 am BOTH nights. Our plan to stave off the deadly poison on Friday was hampered by arriving at Mersing only to discover that the tides were too low for the speedboat to take us to paradise. All fifteen of us ended up being transported to a local hotel room suite where the "this will end in tears" game of Ring of Fire ensued, interrupted only by a few bouts of Charades and the snores of those for whom the bed had been too enticing. Five and a half hours later, we finally arrived on Pulau Rawa for the intense carnage to continue on Saturday when another fifteen reprobates displaced from Singapore (aka friends) arrived. Cue vigourous amounts of chillaxation, chats about life, the universe and everything, lip-smackingly delicious grub and a whole lotta P*A*R*T*Y.
1. Accept that it's a paradoxical Shopper's Paradise. For a country that has over two million malls, one might say that Singaporeans must be obsessed with retail: both online and offline. Wrong. Here, it's all about the 'look look, see see' past time of window shopping and saving on the electricity bill by cooling off in the air-conditioned surroundings of a mall rather than putting your own unit on at home. Give it time - you will catch yourself doing this at some point.
There's no Amazon, there are few pickings on eBay's empty shelves (there's no chance to bargain, you see) and even if you can buy stuff over the phone (rare), you will no doubt find the conversation 'challenging' unless you speak good Singlish (remember: it's 'oreddy' not 'already').
Fear not, if the thronging crowds of Orchard Road scare you, a plethora of items to quench your materialistic thirst awaits you in the forgotten malls of Singapore (if you know which one you need). Added to those, forums such as Singapore Expats, Adpost and Gumtree are the place to find locals of all ages selling a huge variety of secondhand items. Note: You will have to arrange a pick up yourself in person and be prepared to negotiate on the price.
2. Get used to going 'marketing'.
No, I'm not talking about business development. Here, they distinguish food shopping from other types of purchasing adventures and call it 'marketing'. So, don your best t-shirt and shorts combo, slide into your flip-flops and head to your nearest 'wet market'. Often the best place for sourcing fresh fish and quality vegetables at prices that are kind on the wallet. Warning 1: The floors can get quite slippery. Warning 2: Chinatown market even sells turtles and frogs... for consumption.
The three main contenders in the supermarket space are (in order of cost): Fair Price (it does what it says on the tin, but if you're whipping up a Western feast, you may find it challenging to grab everything on your shopping list); Carrefour (excellent for wine and cheese); and Cold Storage (you can buy everything here but certain European items are shockingly expensive). Both Fair Price and Cold Storage offer online shopping, which are solid services except that the websites are not as user-friendly as they could be.
Finally, just deal with it: alcohol is unbelievably expensive, especially when compared to the rock-bottom duty free prices charged at Changi airport. Just make sure you journey further afield than Malaysia, lest you be stopped in your tracks at the checkout on your return to Sin City. It's embarrassing, you'll look a fool and don't bother trying to pretend you're from another flight - they might wrestle you to the ground and cart you off for terrorist questioning.
3. Take up eating as a past time. Famous for their love of all things edible, Singaporeans think, talk and dream about food. During lunchtimes with your colleagues, conversations on planned or past consumption are the norm. There are huge numbers of food bloggers who you will see with their cameras out getting the best angles before diving in, bib first. Some places, like Tippling Club, even expressly forbid cameras at the dinner table lest the constant flashing annoy fellow diners.
The Singapore food bible, Makansutra actually has an index listed by dish and contributors to recommendation site, Hungry Go Where often list out their experience course by course, mouthful by mouthful. Be warned: Hungry Go Where can be infuriatingly confusing with some diners giving a restaurant the highest accolades and others labelling it as the worst dining experience in the history of mankind. I recently found this out and was involved in an online battle of the tastebuds, between myself, Massive Dynamic and low ernest. Fun!
Quick tips for eating out at (i) Hawker centres:
Carry tissues at all times to chope your seats.
Grade B is dirtier but it tastes better.
Learn to sweat while you eat (aforementioned tissues will help).
(ii) Low to mid-range restaurants:
Despite what it says on the menu, even if you order starters, all dishes will likely come at the same time.
Waiters often can't explain what is on the menu, so be patient.
If wine is on the menu, don't expect it to be anything to write home about unless you're spending more than S$70.
If you can't face leaving the house and are hungry as sin, look no further than Hungry Go Where's Delivery Service. With a huge variety of offerings, you will find something you desire. The only odd thing is that you proceed with a 'normal' online order but at the last moment, you have to call a number. Through some astonishing technical wizardry, the person at the call centre will know everything about you and you only need confirm your order, lessening the time you have to spend practicing your Singlish. Die die, must try.
Finally, be warned that Durian-flavoured anything is available. Try it if you dare.
Durianmisu anyone? Anyone?
4. Marvel at the transport options but laugh at the way they are used.
Singapore Taxi Drivers to Learn French.
Taxi: Enjoy bouncing around the back of old cabs, the smell of rotting pandan leaves (to ward away cockroaches) and odd conversations ("Dogs. Do you like dogs? I like dogs."). Whilst you may be shocked at some drivers' poor navigation skills ("I dunno, you teach me, ah?") a read of the famous Taxi Drivers' Blog (you can also now buy the book) will, no doubt, leave you feeling less angry and more compassion for those in this difficult line of work.
MRT: Despite this politeness campaign being played everyday on the MRT and large pictures of Phua Chu Kang everywhere, aunties are oblivious and will routinely barge their way to the front, when embarking and disembarking, of people waiting to board the MRT and then getting on before anyone else has had a chance to leave the train. Sadly, auntie assault is a punishable offence.
Bus: Good luck deciphering the bus network. You cannot just walk to a bus stop and figure out which bus you need to take you where you're going: the stops just list the buses stopping there and where they are going. So, unless you are naturally lucky in life, please consult gothere before you embark on a bus journey, lest you end up going from Tiong Bahru to Orchard Road via Ang Mo Kio.
Elevator: For some unknown reason, it appears to be a commonly held belief amongst Singaporeans that jabbing one's finger on the elevator button will make the deck appear faster. Being half-Singaporean, I must confess that I have found myself doing this, on the off-chance it really works. Try it for yourself and feel closer to this unique culture.
Walking: Walk at a snail's pace. That's all you need to do to walk like a local.
Driving: Pick a lane, any lane. Swerving and braking hard are all acceptable. Just don't dare to jump any red lights and for goodness sake, don't do an OJ Simpson if you are summoned by sirens.
5. Come to terms with island fever.
Apparently, the 'victim' is so traumatised that she cannot get out of bed...
Accept that you won't find much of interest in the Straits Times, and that some of your favourite websites may be blocked. Instead, charter a yacht, hire a private island, or escape to one of the many destinations you can get to for a weekend without taking any time off work (Malaysia, Thailand, Vietnam, and Indonesia) and enjoy the bliss of arriving back to Singapore through the world's best airport. Now that it houses the world's tallest slide (in an airport), there's all the more reason to just hang out at the airport even if you haven't got a plane to catch. For real: it's on my 'to do' list.
All in all, you will hear the following phrase on repeat: "Life in Singapore is just so easy." It's true: the weather is almost permanently superb (save for the occasional monsoon rains), good food is ubiquitous, and there's hardly any crime. One the flip side, it lacks avant-garde creativity and has been likened to a warm bath.
I'm lucky because I get to see both sides, being part local and part ang mo. It was very baffling indeed for my colleagues when I first arrived. How could they categorise this person speaking with a plummy English accent about how much they love to eat century eggs who could then flick into finely tuned Singaporean patter on the subject of contract law, hor?
If you're even faintly interested in exploring Southeast Asia and having the cash to do so, come to live and work in Singapore to experience it for yourself. It's the closest you can get to taking a gap year and seeing the world without actually having to give up your job.
Basking in the glow of post-marriage smugdom, this month we have mostly been:
- Chillaxing at the 'old KM8', Tanjong Beach Club. Swank, sun-kissed scantily clad ladies, and a whole lotta champagne and cocktails are the order of the day. What used to be the weekend hangout for the Sunday smash heads in Singapore has been converted into a rather posh venue, complete with sparkly infinity pool and a brightly lit restaurant. Upmarket beach parties have come to stay.
- Making the cut at the Survival Chic launch party. Held at the elegant La Villa on River Valley Road, Virginia Brumby and Christophe Ferreira hosted the launch for their inside knowledge membership club, Survival Chic. Members enjoy two main benefits: (i) 30% off the entire bill on their first visit to each handpicked partner: upscale restaurants and bars, wine shops, yacht hire, spas, cooking and art classes; and (ii) Invitations and special treatment at carefully selected lifestyle events: art openings, wine tastings, special dinners, film festivals, and polo. Sign up now!
- Street-fighting. There's nothing like a good dressing up theme to get me in the mood for a party. My definition of 'good' is simply a theme that I can manage with household items. Note: Yes, those are shower puffs on my head.
- Attending a preview of John Clang's exhibition. Hailing from Singapore, but now displaced in New York, photographer John Clang's work is both personal and innovative. Super-imposing himself onto a Skype call screen, ripping up photos and putting them back together again and taking shots through circular holes are all in his repertoire. Thought-provoking and intriguing images - the exhibition is on until 3 July at new gallery, 2902.
Up next month is the long-awaited opening of Marina Bay Sands, another pimping boat party and more house parties before people start shooting off for their 'summer' holidays.
Whilst it may appear that you can barely walk two block in Singapore's central shopping district without stumbling across another building site earmarked for yet another monstrous mall, we should take care to remember that there is respite from the cookie cutter luxury retail outlets... The forgotten malls of Singapore, I salute you: most were built in the late 1970s and 1980s so have withstood 20-30 years of hardcore mish-mash retail and 'look look, see see' shoppers.
1. People's Park Complex: Vintage memorabilia, DIY electronics, goldsmiths, arguably the most popular bak kua store on the island, copy watches, and a small television showing disturbing footage of someone having a blepharoplasty* (*CAUTION: not for the faint-hearted). This mall's got it all. Snack stop: Head for the small stalls outside selling edible duck parts (there are more than you initially think, trust me). Turn right and search for the fried goods stall which sells by far the best hei-piah (prawn cake) in Singapore: light, yet glutinous dough, topped with a prawn and deep-fried to perfection. Wolf it down and give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back.
2. Peninsula Plaza: Guitars, fancy dress, vintage clothes, opticians, and specialist camera stores. This is a mecca for music lovers, photographers and those who like to dress a little differently. Snack stop: It has to be Sotong Ball OnStik from Old Chang Kee.
3. Golden Mile Complex: Were you wondering where all the Thai people hang out in Singapore? Look no further. More Thai shops, clubs, barbers, travel agents and eateries than you can shake a lemongrass stick at, the mall dubbed 'Little Thailand' has it all, including an enormous supermarket. Snack stop: Clear Tom Yam soup from Diandin Leluk Thai Restaurant. (Okay, not really a snack, per se, but if you want your spicy socks blown off, don't miss this gem.)
4. Bras Basah Complex: If it's obscure books and magazines, or you're about to get crafty, this is your hang out. Art Friend is the place you need to head if you're planning to paint yourself blue, make yourself something out of felt and all other obscure creative activities. The Complex is also home to my favourite jeweller that would never make it big in the UK: Fook Hing (see above). Snack stop: Grab a coffee amongst the bookshelves at Popular's cafe or go retro and order an ice cream float at Jack's Place. Time to watch the world go by and catch up on a little reading.
5. The Peace Centre: The entire ground floor of this place is dedicated to all things 'print'. If you need to waste half a rainforest printing out your memoirs, head here and compare the prices. Be warned though, the fancy dress shop which used to exist here has now morphed into a dodgy looking 'university' - one of those ones offering 'degrees' in Needlework & Stitching, with a major in English for Beginners. Snack stop: There is a Turkish kebab place next to the main exit, which always seems fairly popular. It even has the enticing 'elephant's leg'. Check your cholesterol levels before ordering.
Finally, a special mention for most short-sighted name for a mall - Singapore Shopping Centre. Did they really think that they would be the only one?
With the announcement that the first three-Michelin-starred restaurants from Europe to set foot in Singapore have now opened, here's a quick round-up of the top five starless gastronomic adventures before Mr. Michelin and his cronies come to town.
5. Tiong Bahru Boneless Chicken Rice (#02-82, Tiong Bahru Food Centre). I am wondering, after all the free promotion this establishment gets from my blog, whether they would print me a t-shirt. Mr. Michelin should try obtaining the chilli sauce recipe. I am sure the response would be similar to Charlton Heston at an NRA Rally: "From my cold dead hands."
4. Ju Shin Jung (West Coast). If you like grilled meats, seared to perfection at your table and accompanied by 101 small plates of crunchy Korean 'tapas', this is the place for you. The quality of the meat is divine, the staff are attentive and there's nothing quite like stinking out the taxi ride home with the smell of BBQ on your clothes. Post-meal shower essential.
3. Si Chuan Dou Ha (60th floor of UOB Plaza). The view of the Marina is hard to beat: the stunning Marina Bay Sands, the Fullerton Hotel and the Esplanade glint by day and by night. If fiery food is your forte, pluck a couple of the four chilli rated dishes to tantalise your taste buds. Beware though, you should opt for some of the more sedate dishes to balance out your meal lest you turn into a fire-breathing dragon at the table. Thankfully, the tea ninjas are always on hand to put out any manageable explosions. The mesmerising act of pouring water from an incredibly long spouted kettle into your tea cup will take your mind off the burn. Deliciously challenging.
2. Kuriya Penthouse (Orchard Central). If you are adventurous and you like the taste of Japan, you must try the omakase (tasting) menu here. After ascertaining any particular dislikes or allergies, the chef will take you on a journey through some of Japan's finest and most unique ingredients. The menu changes each week and is also designed for each guest. The staff are well-versed in exactly what you are eating, can recommend wines to accompany your meal and know when to interrupt your adventure to clear, serve and pour. You can opt to enjoy your dessert on the terrace overlooking the Istana Park and you will be pleasantly surpised at the spread the chef pâtissier has put on: wonderful flavoured mousses (have as many as you like) and your own selection of fresh fruits from an enormous basket.
1. Tippling Club. Whilst the other picks have specialised in food from Singapore, Korea, China and Japan, Tippling Club surpasses them all by offering a delectable journey across the gastronomic globe. The ten course tasting menu is the essential order of the day and the fact that each dish is assembled within viewing distance adds a unique je ne sais quoi. Chef Ryan Clift and Head Bartender Matthew Bax carefully note whether you have dined there before in order to shape the menu to your extraordinarily special dining experience. Mr. Michelin - I dare you to avoid awarding at least one star to this neat little club.
I am a firm believer that if the food is exquisite but the service is poor, any meal will be immediately tainted. Somehow, the sourness of a face can turn my food bitter, and it's not just all about smiling. Service that is (i) over-zealous (constantly clearing my barely dirty plate in a Chinese restaurant or topping up my wine glass after just one sip) or (ii) lost in translation (staff unable to explain menu items and getting the orders wrong) are two of my biggest bugbears in Singapore. WHY can serving staff not understand the key points of their job? I think this will be biggest challenge in Singapore for these new Michelin kids on the block.
Find me a waiter that can explain to me why I should try the 2005 Chablis rather than the 2006 White Rioja or exactly what is in the funny looking foam on my plate and I shall shake him by the hand. Sadly, for the most part, servers here have thrown out their brains along with their staff handbooks. Thankfully, a new reality television series, Can You Serve? may be able to infiltrate this nation of surly staff. The very fact that it exists is testament to my dining woes.
Having said all this, I am very excited at the prospect of our next 'special occasion' when I shall surely plump for one of these Singapore-side Michelin-starred experiences. Having tried Michelin-starred maze and The Harwood Arms in London, I am au fait with what the accolade means for my taste buds. However, at S$50 for dessert, I would want Mr. Savoy himself to feed it to me. Mr. Michelin, if you're reading, please pass on the message.
